Does your life leave a lot of time for relaxing?
My Bedtime of 9:30
Nowadays, I’m in bed at 9:30pm on a school night. This is extremely early by typical teenage terms. I used to— and most of my friends still do— go to sleep quite late, getting only five to six hours of sleep. However, if high school taught me anything, it is that sleep is important. In reality, going to bed so early is the only time I truly get to relax. Despite school almost ending, life doesn’t leave much time to relax. Going to school as a second semester senior is hard enough. Add to that, sports and other extracurriculars. I could only wish for a time when I was young enough where all I had to do was relax.
Senioritis hit me hard. The accumulation of years of hard and diligent work led to major burnout once all my college applications were submitted. I had hoped that the second semester of senior year would be stress-free and fun. Everyone who said that lied. Although the stressors are not the same or as apparent as before, there is always something to be stressed about. I still need to do that essay. I still need to study for that test. Except compared to earlier years, I loathe doing any assignment, as I countdown the days I walk across that stage to my diploma. The accumulation of years of hard and diligent work led to burnout, and burnout is not fun.
Sports take up the majority of the afternoon. Practices are everyday until 6:30. By the time I get home, it’s already 7pm. I still need to eat dinner and debate whether I should even open my computer. This season, we were cursed blessed with sixteen games in one month. At one point, we had five games in four days. Other years, I would’ve been ecstatic. More playing time in soccer… yay! However, all those games add up, especially on the legs. After every game, I am left exhausted— usually sprawled on the floor— and I want nothing but sleep.
Even though the workload is much less, burnout does not help you relax. You’re doing nothing, but you’re also not relaxing. Relaxing should calm you down and make you happy. However, burnout leaves you as a hollow soul with no motivation. There is nothing relaxing about that.
One day, my dad pointed out my elementary school. “Don’t you miss those days?” my dad asked, “No stress, just playing on the playground.”
I realize that the only time I got to truly relax was when I was in elementary school, where nothing mattered. I had lived only about 10 years, so that wasn’t enough for any burnout yet. But looking back, when was the last time I had to relax? In the summer, despite being on beaches and mountains, I spent my time worrying about senior year. I couldn’t even relax during my winter break in Europe, as I was cranking out one college essay after another. There was always something to stress about, never truly a moment to relax.
Supposedly now would be the time to relax. Senior year is almost over, and the freedom of summer before college starts is on the horizon. Although I can physically relax— much needed from my legs— my mind can never relax. The future is even more stressful, and any relaxation time is ruined by burnout.
A 9:30pm bedtime might seem like the ultimate relaxer, nothing is truly relaxing. There is simply always something on my mind, but that comes with growing up. Life will only get more stressful. Once I get over this bout of burnout, I will find my ways to relax. Maybe a nice nap in the sun, or night-in watching movies. Until then, it looks like I’ll be going to be at 9:30pm.
Yo Sarisa, great blog you have here. I liked how you described burnout and how even relaxing doesnt feel relaxing anymore. It made me think about how many students feel the same way but dont talk about it. One thing you could do is break up some longer paragraphs so it’s easier to read. Also, maybe repeat the idea of “burnout” a little less to keep it fresh. Otherwise, great blog post!
ReplyDeleteHi Sarisa! This was a really interesting essay, and I think you captured the essence of burnout and growing up well. I like all the moments you compare your thoughts now to your thoughts in the past since it really helped put into perspective how you’ve changed over time. I think somewhere you could maybe expand on a bit more is the third to last paragraph where you talk about elementary school being stress-free. Also, the “But looking back” sentence confused me a bit at first, so maybe you could say something like “but looking back as a senior” to make the transition between reflecting on elementary and reflecting on recent years a bit clearer. Overall, I like the way you connect physical and mental burnout and acknowledge the realities of both stress and growth.
ReplyDeleteHi Sarisa, this is a great essay! I agree with you that getting enough sleep is important, and every day I tend to sleep later then I want to. Due to not getting a sufficient amount of sleep in weekdays, I tend to wake up drowsy and have to fight to not fall asleep in first period. I like how you take about burnout, and how you never get to truly relax because when you're trying to relax but you're really thinking about something that is not relaxing. Something you could add to the essay is maybe comparing how your days have changed from when you were sleeping later to now when you sleep at 9:30. Do you wake up feeling better thus allowing you to be more productive during the day? Overall, you did a great job!
ReplyDeleteHey Sarisa! I think that your description of burnout is relatable for a lot of people. I was just thinking the other day about how excited I'll be once the school year is over and I can finally relax, but then realization quickly hit that my summer will be equally filled with extracurriculars and prepping for college applications. Although it's difficult to feel like there is no point in the future where I'll truly be able to relax, I think that there will be brief moments where stress and responsibility is low, and I'll be able to relax for a bit. On that note, I suggest that you talk a little bit about how this realization (that you will never feel truly relaxed) has affected you. Did it change the way you go about your life at all? Overall, great blog!
ReplyDeleteHi Sarisa! I can totally relate to mental and physical burnout from personal experiences. The conclusion nicely ties back to your 9:30 bedtime intro, bringing the essay full circle. However, there is a bit of unnecessary repetition throughout that you could cut back on; like, though phrased differently each time, you mention not being able to relax properly quite a few times. Also, instead of just telling us that your childhood was stress-free, you could try showing more through vivid scene examples to better highlight the contrast between your carefree early years and your days now. Overall, great job!
ReplyDeleteHi Sarisa! Great blog post: super relatable. Most Uni students will find a strong connection with the feeling of burnout you're describing--I know I'm coming very close to it. I like your mix of reflection on the past and using examples from earlier feelings to add to your present reflections. It gives your essay a special, nostalgic tone. If anything, I would probably suggest reducing the repetition of the word relax and your commonly used phrases about relaxing, and also maybe relate back more often to the 9:30 bedtime you mention. Overall, great essay!
ReplyDelete